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10 Ways To Limit Your Child’s Screen Time
 ... Without Scream Time

By Judy Arnall
March/April 2008

Eight-year-old Kyle received no less than 9 new computer and video games for the holidays. His parents are wondering how to keep him under the health professionals’ recommended screen time limit of one and a half hours a day without Kyle throwing a fit.

It can be difficult to impose rules on time spent in front of the TV, video machine, DVD and handheld players, but it’s not impossible. Here are the top ten ways to help your child manage screen time and not destroy your valuable parenting relationship.

Child with remote1. Redirect to other stimulation. Have board games set up, sports equipment ready to go or recipe ingredients laid out and ready for a baking session.

2. Be involved and knowledgeable of where they travel on the Internet and with whom they play games. Spend time building the parent-child relationship by taking an interest in their online gaming and chatting pursuits. It’s easier to direct them to your activities after you connect for a while in the playgrounds that they’re familiar with.

3. Don’t punish - problem-solve! It’s not a battle of you against them. It’s you and your child against the problem. You are both on the same team! Work the problem out together to everyone’s satisfaction and enjoy the new rules and increased connection.

4. Model a balanced life that includes seven keys to health and happiness. Invite your child to participate with you in your pursuit of the seven keys of a balanced life. Many children will get active if the parents or the whole family is involved.

7 Keys to a Balanced Life
• Social Time - time spent with friends
• Physical Activity Time - exercise, sports, active play
• Mental Exercise Time - educational activities, games, puzzles, homework, reading
• Spiritual Time - volunteering, meditating, solitude, unstructured play, church
• Family Time - doing projects
• Financial Time - job
• Hobby Time - leisure pursuits and projects

5. Negotiate! Make good use of Family Conferences, “parent concern” consulting and negotiation sessions to discuss time limits that meet everyone’s needs.

6. Issue time tokens. Each hour of physical activity will garner a child an hour of screen time.

7. Get it in writing. Draw up a daily schedule and discuss where screen time fits in with the day’s already scheduled activities. Children can sign into time slots.

8. Make a contract. Draw up a weekly or monthly agreement that has limits decided by both the parent and child together. Display the agreement in a prominent place. Point to it when the complaining occurs. Discuss when the contract is up for renewal.

9. Change the environment. Sometimes it’s easier to move around the setting then to change the other person. Seriously consider whether adding more equipment and hardware will add to the screen time and decide against bringing it into the house. Move the computer and gaming systems into the main family area. Having one unit for the children to share means more fighting over screen time, but it can also mean more time spent in learning the valuable skill of negotiating and less individual screen time.

10. Teach your child the fine art of haggling! “Hey, Eric. Wow, you made another level! Good for you! Now, I need you to do the dishes. What time would you like to get at them?” Insist they give you a time and haggle when they give you an outrageous one. Allowing your child to choose makes it easier for them to abide by it. 

Judy Arnall is a parent educator, mother of five “wired” children and author of “Discipline Without Distress: 135 tools for raising caring, responsible children without time-out, spanking, punishment or bribery” (Professional Parenting Canada 2007). www.professionalparenting.ca


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